Archive for tag: Lost Tribe

Home at last!

Journal _half _v1

We’re all home safe now. Red eventually went and signed the customs forms for Crispy at the airport. He keeps muttering about being licked by sniffer dogs.

I feel like this whole Lost Tribes thing has been a really good bonding experience for us all. I’m happy that I followed in my Great Uncle Methusius’ footsteps and tracked down my ancestors, but they weren’t the nicest ancestors (as you probably remember they tried to eat us). Not very ancestor-y of them. Anyway, I don’t feel like a piece of my family puzzle is missing anymore. I’ve always got my ace friends: Red, Miss Green, Blue and Crispy.

OK, gotta run! Red wants me to organise his CD collection by colour. Yesterday it was by starting letter. Fun game!

Catch ya,



Well this is just typical. Men! Really? You just can’t rely on them...

Oh, the humanity!

I’m a wreck! What are they going to do to me! Oh, please please please. How am I going to escape? HEEEEEEEELPPPPPPPPP! I’m too young to be licked and partially eaten!

Capture my good side at least!

To be quite honest with you, I’m flattered these little guys want to eat me. Really I am, but seriously...  this statue they’ve made in my honour really needs some work. I mean, I look all, how do you say… wooden?

I don't want my nut shrunk!

Shrunkeness is not in my nature. Iíve got to think of my nut. I canít have that shrinking! Helpp! Which way do I... oh no, shhhh. Wait, I better stop typing... shhh...

Shrunken Head Red!

I mean, getting eaten by these guys may not be so bad… Lots of the greats haven’t been appreciated in their time… Maybe it’ll just speed up the whole fame thing a little bit. Hmmm it’s got me thinking at least. More than I can say for Yellow. He’s probably just thinking about his shrunken nut. Pfft. 

We're cooked!

SPORTSFANS! This is all wrong. Take a look at this video, I mean… we’re cooked. Goners. Bingo. Outta Here. Mince meat. Salad sandwich. Whatever you want to call it, we’re goners. Someone, call my chauffeur!! I need to get out of here! STAT!

Some chocolates will never change!

Hey girls and boysies,

You will NEVER believe what happened today. HA! It was HILARIOUS!!!! This girl, you know, she was alright looking, but nothing on me (of course), came over to Blue today… and guess what he did!? I’ll tell you: he called her a FOX!

I knew she wouldn’t be interested! I mean, no woman in their right mind would be interested in Blue… but I guess part of me was just a little, I dunno, upset? I’m the irresistible one… You know? Where does Blue come off pulling tricks like that?

She seems a bit too keen, if you know what I’m saying… Miss Green ain’t that easy to please!


Xxxx Love as always. 

Stuck in a cave with a chocolate with no name.

Hey Sports fans,

Thought I should probably send you an update after Crispy and I were stuck in that cave. I mean, once he stopped shaking (6 hours later) it was ok. We sat by the fire, discussed some breathing techniques I learnt in the mountains of Nepal, and everything was ok. But, and I do say ‘but’, he makes a point… what was that crazy little fellow doing in the cave with us?

Anyhow, I promised him I’d find out… you know, ‘cos I’m the pack leader and all. I’ll let you know when I get to the bottom of it.

Stay cool,

They're going to eat me!

The tribe has locked me in a hut with Blue. It’s like a cell. I’m like a man waiting for the bell to toll – only I’m not a man, I’m one of the M&M’s®. I don’t want to be eaten! That’s what they’re planning, you know. I know I’m delicious, but being eaten by another one of the M&M’s®… it’s unheard of. (Ahhh, Blue keeps slapping me and telling to me snap out of it. I think he’s enjoying this.) Oh, I don’t want to be on the most endangered list. Somebody, please help. I’m doomed to be lunch! And I don’t want to be extinct… that sounds like I’m smelly!

Yours in terror,